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Thursday, September 6, 2007 will guide you through every aspect of dating online and dating sites. From general DOs and DON'Ts of online relationships, to using the various dating services available online, we have tips for how to do it all, right here.

Ready to find your mate? Click here for our guide to choosing an dating service.

We are also working on our FAQ, frequently asked questions section, to help with all of your online dating needs. If you have a question or need dating tips in an area not addressed on our site, please feel free to contact us.

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Monday, March 26, 2007

What Women HATE Most About Single Guys

By David DeAngelo

If you listen to a group of attractive, single women talking alone over dinner or drinks, the topic will always turn to MEN. And in most cases, it will eventually turn into a RANT session about how hard it is to find good men to date... Which will lead to a FULL-ON RAG SESSION about men in general...

...And wind up with a detailed list of all the traits guys have that are ANNOYING AS HELL. The reality is that single women have an entire laundry list of traits, qualities, and characteristics that they HATE in single guys. Did you know this? I didn't think so.

Well, the truth is that up until a few years ago, I didn't know this either. So take heart in the idea that you're about to learn something that most men on this planet will DIE not knowing.

My hope is that what I'm about to share with you will change how you interact with women FOREVER... and help you meet and date more of the kinds of women you're interested in.


Friendship And Romance

For women, friendships and romantic relationships are two separate things. They are NOT the same. One can lead to another, but it's RARE when it happens. Remember that. One CAN lead to another, but it's RARE.

"Romantic" relationships are very different from "friend" relationships. While most men would sleep with most of their female "friends" if the woman "came on" to them, most women would NOT sleep with most men that they consider "just friends". But why is this? How do women differentiate between "just friends" and "I'll be intimate with you"? And why is it so hard to become "more than friends" with a woman you've been "just friends" with for a long time?

The answer to this riddle is very interesting to me. I believe that the answer comes down to understanding HOW women "know" when they want to "be intimate" with a man... and, even MORE importantly, understanding how women "know" when they DON'T want to "be intimate" with a man...

The thing that tells a woman whether the guy she's with is "friend" material or "lover" material is how she FEELS. It's a combination of EMOTIONAL feelings and PHYSICAL feelings. It is NOT logic. She might USE logic to "rationalize" her decision... or she might USE logic to SOUND like she has a good reason for either "being with" or "not being with" a particular guy.

But don't let that distract you. Logic isn't important AT ALL in this context.

So let me say this another way. A woman FEELS something emotionally and/or physically, then she uses those FEELINGS as the basis for her "decisions" and actions with a particular guy.

If she feels that "Ewwww Yuck!" feeling, then her "logical" conclusion will probably not be that she wants to date the guy in question.

If she feels that "It's Gettin' Hot In Here" feeling, then her "logical" conclusion will probably be that this guy is interesting and attractive, and a good "choice" to date. At this point she'll take ACTION on her feelings and thoughts...

It goes like this:


First the FEELING, then the THOUGHT... and THEN the action.

Now, with this in mind, let me ask you an important question: How do most guys behave around women that they're "romantically" interested in? And another: What do they do to get the woman that's the object of their desires to be with them? Take a few minutes to think about this. Make a list if you have paper and pen handy. I'm serious. I'll wait. Come back when you're finished.

Now take a look at your list. I'll bet that almost every single thing on your list was something "external". In other words, your list probably contains things like "Take her to dinner" and "Give her compliments" and "Buy her flowers" and "Call her often". These are all things that demonstrate that he's INTERESTED.

They are NOT things that trigger those emotional and physical feelings inside of a woman that tell her that THIS IS THE GUY. In other words, men try to use "props" to LET A WOMAN KNOW HE'S INTERESTED...

...HOPING that when the woman sees these displays she'll be interested in him.

Almost NONE of the things men do to court women make women FEEL ANYTHING even remotely similar to "Attraction" and "Arousal". Of course, you know this.

You've probably done this stuff about a bazillion times. I have, too. I know what it's like to try OVER AND OVER to let a particular woman know that I'm interested... only to have her NOT RESPOND in a "romantic" way.

The PROBLEM with this kind of thing is that it makes TWO HUGE MISTAKES at once.

First, it's just the plain-old wrong way to go. Telling or showing a woman that you "like her" has no effect on how she feels about YOU. In the moment it sure seems to make sense... "If I show her how I feel, she'll return the feelings". Duh. Like I said, it seems like the right thing to do in the moment (when your inner little girl has a big fat crush). But it's not... it will have NO effect on her feelings for you.

And second, it communicates clearly that YOU DON'T GET IT. It tips a woman off INSTANTLY that you're not hip to what's going... and it kills your chances with her. Say what? You mean that doing nice things for women, and trying to show how you feel can actually HURT your chances with a woman? Yea, it can.

Look, if you've been dating a woman exclusively for six months, and her birthday comes... it's OK to buy her a gift and tell her that you like spending time with her. YOU'RE ALREADY IN A RELATIONSHIP. But if you've known a woman for six DAYS and you try this kind of thing, you're going to shoot yourself in the foot.

Women are EXPERTS at recognizing men who DON'T GET IT. And if you DON'T get it, PLUS you're trying to compensate for the fact that you don't get it with gifts and compliments, then you're REALLY screwed (or not screwed, as the case may be).

Remember what I'm about to tell you. Burn it into your mind. Write it on a sticky-note and put it on your computer monitor...


Keep in mind that single, attractive women watch guys do this stuff 24/7. They shake their pretty heads and say "He doesn't get it... He doesn't get it... He doesn't get it" over and over and over.

The point is that if you DON'T GET IT, then nothing you do is going to work for you. The problem is bigger than you can imagine, and you're going to need to take a totally different road to get where you're going...

What Attractive Women hate Most About Single Guys...

Let's return to where we started. There are a few particular things that REALLY annoy single, attractive women. One of the reasons that these things annoy women is because they're DEAL KILLERS. A woman can like everything about you, but if you do these things (or even ONE of these things), it can DESTROY your chances of success with a particular woman.

Here are a few of the BIG things that single women hate:

1) Giving Up Your Status In Exchange For Her Attention And Approval

If I had to describe the one single thing that both annoys women and DESTROYS a guy's chances, it would be this. It has taken me a long time to see this particular pattern, but it's EVERYWHERE.

Men, in effect, say "Hi, I want your approval and attention. I'm willing to let YOU be the one who's in control... and let YOU call the shots... and do anything to please YOU... if you'll give me your attention and approval". But the problem is that women DON'T WANT you to give up your status and "manliness". Women aren't ATTRACTED to men who act weak and tentative. Women secretly HATE IT when a guy does something to demonstrate that he'll give away his power in return for approval.


I could literally write an entire book on this one single concept. Take a few minutes to think this one over, and maybe write down the ways that you make this mistake with women. More importantly, think about how you're going to STOP DOING IT IMMEDIATELY.

2) Being Needy, Clingy, And Insecure

When one person "clings" to another person "psychologically", the person who is being "clinged to" RESENTS and REJECTS the needy, clingy emotional parasite... This is WUSS behavior at its worst.

If a guy is on the phone with a girl he just met, and she says "Hey, I have to go", he might say "Aw, well... um... OK. Um, will you call me when you get home?".

Or let's say a guy and a girl are out on their first date, and they're walking around in a large department store. Most guys will follow the woman everywhere, and not leave her side for a minute. If she wanders away, he'll come find her IMMEDIATELY. He'll stay physically close to her, as if he's afraid she'll leave without him.

And an even worse example is a guy who is so emotionally insecure that he actually ASKS a woman to tell him that he's nice, fun, interesting, etc. "Do you think I'm interesting?" "Do you think we could ever have a relationship?" "Am I your type?" Women HATE this stuff. It makes them shiver with the heebie-jeebies. It makes them want to RUN AWAY.

3) Not Leading - And Even Worse, Trying To Get Her To Lead

Women have WUSS-DAR. One of the things that triggers a woman's WUSS-DAR is a man who FOLLOWS. The REAL problem is that most women won't try to LEAD naturally. So you've got a situation where a man is trying to FOLLOW a woman who isn't LEADING.

He's looking for little cues so he knows where to go and what to do... but he isn't getting them. So what does he do? He ASKS for them! He says "So, I was thinking of maybe taking you to Olive Garden for dinner... how does that sound?". Everything about the way he asks says to the woman "I'm trying to figure out what you want me to do... please help me know how you want me to act, where you want me to take you, and what you want me to say".


Men who don't lead, and even worse, try to get a woman to lead, ANNOY THE HELL OUT OF SINGLE WOMEN. They HATE IT!

4) Using Insecure, Approval-Seeking, Low-Status Posture, Gestures, Voice Tone, And Body Language

There's a term that single, attractive, in-demand women use to describe men who use weak, approval-seeking posture, gestures, comments, and mannerisms... The term is "NICE".

"He's nice... but... there's no chemistry." This is one of those areas that's not easy to talk about.

Since SO DAMN MANY GUYS do this stuff, it's almost impossible to explain. It's like trying to tell a fish that they're not going to get anywhere in life if they stay wet. The fish doesn't even KNOW it's wet in the first place.

But let me try. This is important. Go spend a day observing couples. Go places where couples that have just met spend time together. Bars, clubs, coffee shops, whatever. Now watch the GUYS. Watch how they lean towards the women. Watch how they raise their eyebrows in exaggerated response to women's comments. Watch how they slump over, let their shoulders fall forward, and smile fake-ly at whatever the women say.

If you're close enough, listen to how men ask questions and make comments with a voice tone that says "I'm insecure and I'm trying to be extra nice to compensate for it". You'll see it EVERYWHERE.

In fact, you'll see it so much that you'll probably write me back to tell me that I'm the one who's crazy, and that since it happens so much, it must be "the right way". Well, it's not.

If there's one thing that triggers an attractive single woman's WUSS-DAR, it's a man's posture, gestures, eye contact, voice tone, etc. It all happens in an INSTANT. Women read this stuff and interpret it as instantly and accurately as you read and interpret the cover of Playboy.


I'd say that probably 90% of all men alive today INSTANTLY disqualify themselves with women because of this problem. Their voice tone, gestures, posture, etc. TELEGRAPH the message that they're a WUSS. They do a thousand weird little things to let a woman know that they're uncomfortable and "not being themselves". And you guessed it...

Single women HATE IT!

5) Not Understanding That She's A Woman And You're A Man

I'm about to get philosophical on your ass, so be cool. When it comes down to it, most men don't understand women. But the REAL kicker is that most men don't understand MEN, either!

Most guys don't know what it's like to get in touch with their MALE NATURE. Combine these two issues, and you get a guy who behaves in ways that DO NOT trigger ATTRACTION in women. Women have a "nature". A female nature. Men also have a "nature". You guessed it, it's a MALE nature. Women are coy. They like to play hard to get. They like to enjoy the chase. They love anticipation. They love to "let a guy catch them"... Men are competitive. Men are dominant. Men like to play rough games, win things, and rule their territory.

Well guess what? Most men don't BEHAVE like men when they're in the presence of a woman that they "like". And since most men don't understand female human nature, they don't demonstrate that they "get it" when they're with women that they "like".

Women like men. Men like women. There are POWERFUL causes at play here. When you're around a woman you like, don't act like a GIRLY-MAN. It's not sexy, and it's not attractive...

And single women HATE IT!

6) Not Being Interesting To Be Around

Underneath most behavior that I see most guys acting out is a "core belief" that goes like this:

"I don't believe that an attractive woman would want to be around me just because she enjoys my presence... so I make up for it by saying and doing certain things that I hope she'll enjoy... and if she enjoys those other things enough, then maybe she'll want to spend more time with me." Heavy, man.

Well guess what? Most attractive single women KNOW that if a guy isn't interesting to be around, they she's eventually going to go CRAZY being around him. In other words, no amount of material gifts, compliments, dinners, and other "displays" will EVER compensate for a lack of BEING INTERESTING.

Here's a profound thought:

I and several other guys I know have many women who call us often... just because they enjoy being around us. These women would be happy just to be in the same room with us... and enjoy our company. And yes, these women CALL US. Often.

Material gifts, food, flowers, and other "displays" have ZERO lasting value to a woman when it comes to how she FEELS about you... An attractive single woman wants a guy who LIGHTS HER UP. She wants to FEEL GOOD. She wants mystery... she wants to laugh... she wants a challenge... she wants sexual tension...

If you're using compliments, gifts, food, and other "displays" to get a woman's attention... you need to ask yourself a tough question: Is it because you don't believe that a woman would want to be around you just to be around you? Because if you don't know how to be INTERESTING to a woman, then no amount of compensation is going to fix the problem.

If you're boring, predictable, and uninteresting, then you're never going to have women calling YOU to hang out.

Oh, and women HATE IT.

7) Not Understanding Attraction

This is a BIGGIE. You hear me talking about it all the time, right? Maybe now that you've read this newsletter you'll have a better context to understand what I'm about to tell you... If you "get it" with women, it's SUPER INTERESTING and ATTRACTIVE to them.

Women can INSTANTLY FEEL IT when they're with a guy who "gets it". Women know very quickly if they're talking to a guy who understands himself and women... and who enjoys creating and building sexual tension. Women know if a guy speaks the SECRET LANGUAGE of "Sexual Communication". If he doesn't, then she stops all communication on that level. If he does, then it continues.

ATTRACTION Isn't A Choice. Attraction is an emotional and physical RESPONSE... and you can't "convince" a woman to feel it with logic, gifts, and NICENESS. Attraction is the result of a woman meeting a man who understands how attraction works... and who knows what to do in each specific situation to progress to the next level.

The PROBLEM with ATTRACTION, and with success with women in general is that the things you need to DO to be successful are NOT OBVIOUS.

They're "counter intuitive", in many cases. In other words, they're the OPPOSITE of what you'd THINK would make sense. You have to do things like CREATE TENSION... stop doing something that she likes... give her time to miss you... etc.

And if you don't understand ATTRACTION, a woman is going to KNOW IT. And guess what? Single women HATE IT when a man doesn't understand ATTRACTION and how to communicate on this "other level".

Now that I've shared the mistakes, you need the next piece of the puzzle. You need to get an education on how attraction works for women... and the RIGHT things to do up front to give her those emotional/physical feelings inside.

Right now you're probably feeling that excited "Ah Ha!" feeling. That's because you understand something at a different level... you've used your mind to understand something complex... and you feel good about bettering yourself.

Well this is just the TIP of the iceberg. As educational as this has been, this is only the beginning. If you're starting to realize how important it is to get this area of your life handled, then I recommend you make a commitment and take your education to a WORLD CLASS level.

And what's the best way to do that? Well, I've spent the last several years of my life figuring out exactly what does and doesn't work with women. I figured this stuff out for MYSELF... and then I took what I've learned and put it all together to help others learn as well.

My Double Your Dating eBook represents THOUSANDS of hours of research, testing, getting to know guys who were successful with women, and generally organizing every level of this knowledge into an easy-to-understand system that ANY guy can use to increase his success with women and dating.

And I'll tell you something... It works. This eBook is the most advanced and effective program of it's kind available anywhere at ANY price. And I have an offer that you're not likely to find repeated anywhere else... I'll send it to you at MY RISK. You can try it out for a full 7 days, and if you don't see MASSIVE results, just let me know... and pay nothing. That's right, you can try it FREE for 7 days.

On top of all that, I'd like to invite you to sign up for my free, 3-times-weekly dating tips newsletter. There's no obligation, and you can easily remove yourself anytime. And believe me, I hate spam as much as you do. You don't have to worry about me ever sharing your email address with anyone.

Go here to download my eBook and to sign up:

Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

A Secret Women Know That Men Don't

By David DeAngelo

I'd like to tell you a story... It's a story that you might find strangely familiar. Don't be alarmed.

Once upon a time, there was a man who was very attracted to a particular woman. At first, she was just another attractive woman... but the more he got to know her, the more he began to feel attracted to her... and the more time he spent with her, the more that attraction grew into a deep emotional attachment and affection for her.

But there was one problem. As his emotional attachment grew stronger and stronger, he also grew more and more insecure.

Why? Because he couldn't tell whether or not she felt the same way towards him. Sometimes she would say things like "You are so important to me" and "I'm glad that you're in my life"... but nothing ever progressed past the "friendship" stage. There was an occasional hug, an occasional kiss on the cheek from her... and once she even held his hand for a long time while he talked about an emotional issue. But something was wrong with the picture.

She just wasn't acting like a woman that was "falling in love". She was acting like a friend.

The insecurity that he felt became a spiral that amplified itself... and the more insecure he became, the more afraid he grew of "screwing things up" by kissing her or asking her to be his girlfriend. Plus, the more insecure he became, the less time she seemed to want to spend with him.

After spending many days and nights obsessing over this girl, the man finally arrived at the conclusion that if she only knew how HE FELT, that she would feel the same way. So he made a bold move. He TOLD HER how he was felt. He confessed that he was in love, and that he would do anything to be with her.

She looked at him with compassion in her eyes and said "Thank you... I really mean that... but I don't want to mess up our friendship... you're too important to me...".

This only confused the man more. He didn't know how to take it... Did it mean that she really loved him too, but that she was afraid of something? Did it mean that she wasn't ready for a long-term relationship? Did it mean that she didn't love him, but that she was trying to give him a hint? Did it mean that he hadn't tried hard enough? Did it mean that he needed to put everything on the line and REALLY let her know how he felt?

He finally decided that he couldn't go on like this anymore... he had to be with her. He had to make sure that she knew just how much he wanted to be with her... so he took a big step, bought her a symbolic gift, and wrote her a long, long letter... again confessing his feelings. And then the unthinkable happened. She didn't reply.

He called her three times a day for almost a week before reaching her. She made an excuse about being very busy, and said "I'll try to give you a call soon, I have to go"... and hung up...

...but he never got a call back.

Over the following months, the man tried desperately to understand what went wrong... and what happened.


OK, I'm back. Now, wasn't that a sweet story? Heart warming, huh? I know, I should keep my day job, and not take up writing romance novels... Now, let's talk about that story.

That story is basically a MYTH. And I'm not talking about FICTION here. I'm talking about a story that rings true for a great majority of men. A story that is timeless. A story that resonates at a deep level because you can IDENTIFY with it.

And why does this particular story resonate for most men? Because we've all been there in one way or another... at one time or another... and many of us have been there OFTEN in our lives.

Another thing that gives this particular story a lot of power is the powerful negative emotions that it stirs... as a result of the powerful negative experiences that it reminds us of...

Stories and situations like this one really FASCINATE me. They fascinate me because I see them as an opportunity to UNDERSTAND and SOLVE the puzzles that they represent. In this particular situation I think there is a solution. And it lies in understanding a secret that women know but MEN DON'T.

And that secret comes down to the reality that if a woman isn't ATTRACTED to a man, all of his attempts to confess his love, convince her to like him, and court her BACKFIRE.

In other words, they not only DON'T WORK,
they actually make things WORSE. In other words, the very things that a man does to try to make a woman LIKE HIM make her NOT like him. They make her run.

All those great intentions and emotional dedication actual cause the man feeling them to do things that make her go away. It sucks. And I hope that by explaining the process of how this happens to you I'll help you avoid this painful situation in your own future...

The "Instant Ewww"

I'm always fascinated by the idea that we humans don't always understand the message that we're communicating to others... So often we think that because we WANT to communicate a message that others are going to NATURALLY understand what we're trying to say.

Have you ever seen a guy in a foreign car that has wheels on it that cost more than the car itself... with his stereo blasting... and a muffler that somehow AMPLIFIES the raw sound of the 4-cylinder motor...?

Have you ever thought to yourself "I don't think that car is communicating the message to women that he thinks it is"...? Yea, I have too.

Well here's the deal:

If you do something to "let a woman know how you feel"... but she isn't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to backfire. It's going to trigger a feeling that like to call the "Instant Ewww". The Instant Ewww is just as powerful as the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION. Once a woman feels it, YOU'RE DONE. It's over. It's like hammering a RAILROAD SPIKE into the coffin. Once a woman feels the Instant Ewww, she will start behaving differently. In short, she'll disappear.

So where did I get the concept of the "Instant Ewww"? I got it from WOMEN. I have actually heard SEVERAL women use the word "Ewww" when describing how they felt about a guy that was "confessing his love"... of course,
these were guys that weren't loved in return.

So what causes the Instant Ewww? And why would a woman feel it towards a man who was trying to be nice... a guy who was giving her a gift or telling her how he feels?

Because if you think about it from HER perspective, you'll realize that the moment a you do something to "confess", you have created a TURNING POINT in the relationship. Up until that point, you were harmless. I mean, women always know how men feel. She already knew you wanted her. She knew it from the beginning.

But now that you've started pursuing her and talking about how you feel, you've created a NEGATIVE TENSION that is VERY uncomfortable. You've triggered an emotion that is repulsive to women. And it does repel them.

In summary... You can't "make a woman like you" or "change how she feels about you" by doing nice things for her...

Doing "nice" things for a woman who isn't attracted to you HURTS you. It backfires. Worse, it creates the "Instant Ewww" feeling that makes it so she'll NEVER like you. Men make this mistake over and over again in life because they're doing what MAKES SENSE to them. They're doing it because they don't have an understanding of ATTRACTION.

I mean, If you have a friend, and you like them, and you want to make them like you more... and you do some nice thing for them, they will probably like you more.

On the other hand... If you have a woman that you "like" in a romantic way, and she doesn't "feel it" for you, and you do something nice for her because you want HER to like you more, it will BACKFIRE... and she will not only NOT like you more, she will most likely distance herself from you.

Guys think that they need to communicate when they like a woman... as if that's part of the necessary process of getting a girl. In their minds, it goes like this:

Like her —› Tell her you like her —› She likes you

Well remember... if you follow this pattern yourself with women who aren't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to BACKFIRE.

If she's not into you, then it goes like THIS:

She thinks of you as a friend —› You tell her you like her —› She gets the "Instant Ewwws" and never wants to be around you again...

The Answer

There are really TWO answers to this problem. The first answer is what to do if you're in a situation where you like a particular girl, but you don't know if she likes you back.

DON'T GET HEAVY WITH HER. Don't buy her a big gift and write a love letter... Don't send her ten dozen roses to her work with a not that says "From your secret admirer". Don't call her three times a day. And DON'T CONFESS YOUR LOVE for her. If you want to know how she feels about you, KISS HER (and use "The Kiss Test" that you learned on my website and in my book).

As a rule of thumb, don't get heavier than HER. Use SIGNALS from her to find out how she feels... and if you don't know how to read and create those signals, then LEARN.

Asking a woman if she's interested in your in a romantic way, or if you are "her type" will actually DESTROY the chances that she'll like you. Really.

The SECOND answer is to not get into this particular situation in the FIRST PLACE. Avoid it entirely. And how does one do that? One does that by creating ATTRACTION from the beginning. One does that by understanding the dynamics of how and why women have the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION triggered. One does that by knowing what you're doing FROM THE BEGINNING.

And what's the best way to learn THAT skill? I thought you'd never ask... The very best way to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you is to get yourself a copy of my eBook, Double Your Dating.

I've spent several years now studying the ways that men who are "naturals" communicate using their words, voice tone, and body language that makes them MAGNETIC to women. And I'll tell you... it's not magic. You don't have to be rich, handsome, or young. And you don't have to be LUCKY. What you DO have to do is LEARN. It's a skill, and I honestly believe that ANY man can learn it if he wants.

But you're not likely to figure it out by "trial and error". Many of the keys to making women feel ATTRACTION aren't "obvious" at all. In fact, many of them make no sense... and they're the LAST thing you'd do in a particular situation if you didn't know the SECRETS.

I'm telling you, this book will show you the way. I guarantee that this program will INSTANTLY change how you behave around women. And it will start getting you results IMMEDIATELY.

In addition, I'd also like to invite you to sign up for my free dating tips newsletter.

It's free, there's no obligation, I'll never share your email address with anyone, and you can easily remove yourself anytime with no hassles (and no, I'll never pull any of these tricks where I send you a bunch of unwanted junk email when you try to remove yourself).

It's JAM PACKED with dozens and dozens of specific strategies for overcoming fear, approaching women, getting phone numbers and email address from women quickly, great inexpensive or even free date ideas, and advice on how to take things to a "physical" level smoothly and easily.

If you'd like to take your success with women and dating to the next level, and have the kind of success that you've always wanted, then go sign up for my free newsletter, get all the details, and check out some great free samples of the eBook located here:

Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

The Ten Most Dangerous Mistakes YOU Probably Make With Women — And What To Do About It...

Here Are The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With Women — And How To Make Sure YOU Avoid Every One Of These Deadly Common Mistakes...

- By David DeAngelo, Author Of “Double Your Dating”

MISTAKE #1: Being Too Much Of A “Nice Guy”

Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted "nice" guys? Of course you have. Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in YOU.

What's going on here? It's actually very simple...

Women don't base their choices of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for them. And guess what? Being nice doesn't make a woman FEEL that powerful ATTRACTION. And being NICE doesn't make a woman CHOOSE you. I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to ACCEPT... but GET OVER IT. Until you accept this FACT and begin to act on it, you'll NEVER have the success with women that you want.

MISTAKE #2: Trying To “Convince Her To Like You"

What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they REALLY like... but she's just notinterested? Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.

Well, I have news for you... YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A WOMAN "FEELS" WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION! Never, ever, EVER. You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with "logic and reasoning". Think about it.

If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being "reasonable" with her? But we all do it. When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind. Bad idea. One that will never work.

MISTAKE #3: Looking To Her For Approval Or Permission

In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), us guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission". Another HORRIBLE idea. Women are NEVER attracted to the types of men who kiss up to them... EVER.

Don't get me wrong here. You don't have to treat women BADLY for them to like you. But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things", think again. You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get ANNOYED at men who seek their approval.

Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if Wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her...

MISTAKE #4: Trying To “Buy” Her Affection With Food And Gifts

How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her REJECT you for someone who didn't treat her even HALF as well as you did? If you're like me, then you've had it happen a LOT.

Well guess what? It's only NATURAL when this happens... That's right, I said NATURAL. When you do these things, you send a clear message: "I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection".

Your good intentions usually come across to women as over-compensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. That's right, I said that women see this as MANIPULATION.

MISTAKE #5: Sharing “How You Feel” Too Early In The Relationship With Her

Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on. Attractive women are rare. And they get a LOT of attention from men. Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are being approached in one way or another ALL THE TIME.

An attractive woman is often approached several times a DAY by men who are interested. This translate into dozens of times per week, and often HUNDREDS of times per month.

And guess what? Attractive women have usually dated a LOT of men. That's right. They have EXPERIENCE. They know what to expect. And one thing that turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than just about anything is a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, REALLY like you" after one or two dates.

This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves.

Don't do it. Lean back. Relax. There's a much better way...

MISTAKE #6: Not “Getting” How Attraction Works For Women

Women are VERY different from men when it comes to ATTRACTION. You need to accept this fact, and deal with it. When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he INSTANTLY feels a sexual attraction.

But does the same apply for women? Do women feel sexual attraction to men based mostly on looks? Or is something else going on? Well, after studying this topic for over five full years now, I can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things OTHER than looks.

Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around? Think about it.

Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they're attracted to the way a man makes them FEEL than they are to looks alone. If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman. But it's not an accident. You have to LEARN how to do this.

And ANY guy can learn how...

MISTAKE #7: Thinking That It Takes Money And Looks

One of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started... because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age. And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things.

But MOST women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks. There are personality traits that attract women like a magnet... And if you learn what they are and how to use them, YOU can be one of these guys.

YOU DO NOT have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall, or handsome.

Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

MISTAKE #8: Giving Away All Of Your Power To Women

Earlier I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission. Well, another similar tactic that a lot of guys use is GIVING AWAY THEIR POWER to women. Said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants. Another bad idea...

Women are NEVER attracted to men that they can walk all over... Women aren't attracted to Wussies!

MISTAKE #9: Not Knowing EXACTLY What To Do In Each Type Of Situation With Women

Now I'm going to blow your mind... A woman ALWAYS knows what you're thinking. Women are approximately TEN TIMES better than men at reading body language. That's ten TIMES.

I know, it might be hard to believe. But for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it. And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly HOW to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help!

And this goes for ALL aspects of women and dating... Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything. If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and LOSE EVERYTHING. And you KNOW it.

It is VITALLY important that you know EXACTLY how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.

MISTAKE #10: Not Getting HELP

This is the biggest mistake of all. This is the mistake that keeps most men from EVER having the kind of success with women that they truly want. I know, guys don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless. We don't like to ask for help.

Hey, I've been there myself. Let me tell you a little about me and how I figured out how to be successful with women... About five years ago I became fed up with the fact that I didn't know how to approach, meet, and get dates with women that I was attracted to. It frustrated the hell out of me.

One night I was out with a friend, and I saw a woman I wanted to ask out, but I just couldn't get up the nerve to do it. I can still remember that night... right on the spot I made the decision to do whatever it took to learn how to be successful with women and dating.

Well, after a lot of hard work and trying all kinds of crazy things, I finally figured it all out. I can now approach just about any woman and get her number almost instantly. I've dated models, I've dated actresses, and I've dated nice, normal, regular girls as well.

It has been a very rewarding experience. I no longer feel that sick, insecure feeling... like I don't know how to meet women... and I might wind up alone. I know that anytime, anywhere, I can go out and meet attractive women.

I've written a book on the topic, and I've done seminars on both coasts of the United States... and taught tens of thousands of men all around the world.

I Now Have A FREE, Three-Times-A-Week Email Newsletter...

...But the REALLY GREAT news is that I now publish a free email newsletter three times a week that teaches any guy how to increase his success with women DRAMATICALLY. And I'd like to invite you to sign up.

It's free, there's no obligation, I'll never share your email address with anyone, and you can easily remove yourself anytime with no hassles (and no, I'll never pull any of these tricks where I send you a bunch of unwanted junk email when you try to remove yourself).

Of course, it even get's better than that...

In addition to my free email newsletter, I also have a killer downloadable eBook that you can download right now and be reading in literally MINUTES from right now.

It's JAM PACKED with dozens and dozens of specific strategies for overcoming fear, approaching women, getting phone numbers and email address from women quickly, great inexpensive or even free date ideas, and how to take things to a "physical" level smoothly and easily.

To sign up for my free three-times-a-week newsletter AND download your copy of this online eBook, just go here:

Free Newsletter And Download eBook

Oh, And One More Thing...

In this day and age of "instant gratification", I realize that this might just sound like another late-night info-mercial promising to make you rich by next week. Well, that's not the case.

I've spent a lot of time, effort, and energy writing this eBook. I wanted to design and create a program that ANY guy could easily understand and start using IMMEDIATELY to meet and date more women... without having to lie, do dishonest things, or be "manipulative".

I now believe that ANY man can be more successful with women and dating, and I get emails every day with success stories from guys who are using this program to meet and date wonderful women.

I know, I know... an ebook that can teach a regular guy how to be more successful in the dating world? No way.

Well believe me, this program will DRAMATICALLY increase your success with women... I absolutely guarantee it 100%.

If you'd like to take your success with women and dating to the next level, and have the kind of success that you've always wanted, then go sign up for my free newsletter, get all the details, and check out some great free samples of the eBook located here:

Free Newsletter And Download eBook

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

P.S. Do some friends a favor, and FORWARD this article to their email addresses. It might be the biggest gift you ever give them.

Thursday, March 1, 2007

Who Is David DeAngelo... And How Can He Help Me Become More Successful With Women And Dating?

David DeAngelo is the pseudonym of Eben Pagan, a seduction guru and the founder of the "Double Your Dating" company. "Double Your Dating" publishes literature and multimedia on dating and seduction, mostly over the Internet.


David DeAngelo is a dating adviser based in the United States. Originally a student of Ross Jeffries and using the nickname Sisonpyh (hypnosis spelled backwards), DeAngelo's ideas were first widely published and publicized in a post on the underground seduction newsletter called Cliff's List.

DeAngelo's commercial career began with the release of his first bookDouble Your Dating in 2001. Since then, he has released many products aimed at helping men with dating with titles such as theAdvanced Dating series,77 Laws of Success With Women and Dating,Deep Inner Game, andMeeting Women Online.

DeAngelo runs an e-mail newsletter which is distributed to over 1 million subscribers.


DeAngelo argues that much of social behavior is related in some way to sexual reproduction, and that human mating habits do not differ significantly from other species.

He suggests that societal conditioning has programmed many modern men to develop involuntary habits that increase the failure rate of consistently attracting women or negate the attractive qualities that were designed to make women want them.

DeAngelo states in one of his advanced dating technique seminars that people can use his techniques to achieve a variety of goals, whether that goal is to have casual sex or to form more lasting relationships. David DeAngelo, as a member of the Seduction Community as a whole, often comes under fire by women and men who advocate "just being yourself", but is just as strongly defended by his proponents who argue that these opinions are based on ignorance of his actual material.

Advice on attraction

David DeAngelo contends most men lack a deep understanding of women, and thus are at a loss to attract the ones they desire. As a result, men are forced to accept whomever selects them.

DeAngelo believes that women are not as obsessed with the appearance of prospective mates as males are. Further, he contends that typical male courting gambits such as excessive flattery and gifting are seen by women as manipulative and insecure, and are thus ultimately unattractive. Instead, he contends that "attraction isn't a choice" -- women cannot be bribed intochoosing to feel attraction. Rather, DeAngelo asserts that a woman will feel attraction automatically when she perceives a man to have admirable characteristics such as confidence, lightheartedness, humor and independence, qualities he boils down into the shorthand "cocky and funny."

Thus, while a typical man might hope to appeal to a desirable woman with obsequiousness and unbridled enthusiasm, carefully hiding any reservations he might have about her, a "cocky and funny" one would actually make his reservations abundantly clear from the outset, albeit flirtatiously and with humor.

DeAngelo stresses that his recommendations are limited to advising men on how to present themselves more attractively in dating scenarios, and makes it clear that his advice is not necessarily relevant to ongoing relationships.

Terms DeAngelo uses

  • The Inner Wuss: a character trait of men developed through time that causes them to become submissive around women in order to get their approval. DeAngelo claims that women prefer men who are of higher status than them.
  • Cocky and funny: also known as 'cocky comedy', this refers to a humorous mock arrogance intended to communicate with intelligence and being 'a challenge'. DeAngelo points out that it is important to get the balance right, as just using 'cocky' "comes across as insecure, and comedy alone usually comes across as goofy and dumb."
  • Counterintuitive behavior: DeAngelo's description of some of his techniques to attract women, as they are the opposite of what most peoplethink is attractive. Examples of such behavior include teasing a woman offhandedly and refusing to compliment her appearance.
  • Life changes: DeAngelo reiterates that the purpose of his programs is to effect a complete personality and lifestyle change among men that will help them achieve dating success.
  • Emulate the Successful: DeAngelo encourages the following and emulation of those successful with women. He records interviews with those very successful in dating and releases them monthly as part of a subscription service.
  • Sexual Communication: DeAngelo's principle of a 'secret mating language' or 'secret mating dance' that takes place between a man and a woman before they can mate.
  • Reframing: Restructuring one's own beliefs set into a new one, such as changing self-doubt to positive thinking.

Double Your Dating

Double Your Dating is a series of tutorials primarily advertised and sold through the internet.

The foundation for theDouble Your Dating series is an ebook which claims to help men "demystify" much of what goes into attraction. Following the ebook, DeAngelo created further materials in the series, including a second ebook, as well as several ebooklets, seminars on DVDs and CDs covering various topics (notably the Advanced and Mastery series, as well as Meeting Women Online, Deep Inner Game, Power Sexuality, On Being a Man, Cocky & Funny and Body Language and several others), and the monthlyInterviews with Dating Gurus CD subscription.


Some critics regard "Cocky & Funny", DeAngelo's best known technique, as being over-emphasised. They believe that the technique may backfire and be interpreted as arrogant, insecure and phony and may actually harm a man's chances with women. Alternatives have been suggested to "Cocky & Funny", such as "Confident & witty"and "Playful & Confident" ("P&C").

David DeAngelo points out that "arrogance by itself is a turn-off to women", whilst "arrogant humor that MAKES THEM LAUGH is a HUGE turn on." It should also be noted that DeAngelo has acknowledged that his work is a collection of suggestions and ideas and not to be taken as dogma. As evidenced in his Sexual Communication series, DeAngelo encourages students to evaluate his material "with your own minds".